Gaslighting is a tactic that many manipulative people use, everyone from narcissists to psychopaths. In case you aren’t familiar with the term gaslighting, is a slow form of brainwashing that involves things like lying for no reason and wearing a person down over time.
Sometimes it can be hard to tell if someone is trying to gaslight you, but with these following tips, you will be able to recognize the signs quickly. If someone is setting you up for confusion, these things will stick out like a sore thumb. No, you are not losing your mind, you are being gaslighted.
12 Signs You’re Being Gaslighted:
1. They tell you that everyone else is lying to you.
You can’t mention someone else without this person bringing up the idea that that person may be lying about whatever it is you are talking about. This person will have you convinced that the world is out to sabotage your relationship when it isn’t. They are going to force you to turn to them for the ‘right’ information when they are only giving you the ‘wrong’ information.
They call you crazy when in an argument with you or something else of the sort. This is their way of trying to turn things around. While you are reacting normally, they want you to think you are overreacting.
3. They make people dislike you on purpose.
They turn everyone against you so that you don’t have anyone on your side. They want you to be isolated so that you have no choice but to deal with them. If you have nowhere to go, you can’t leave.
They make you out to be a terrible person to their friends and family. While you are the one being abused they would never notice. They do this to gain the upper hand.
They will always accuse you of the things that they are doing. For instance, if they are cheaters, they will call you the cheater. This is done so often that you will end up feeling the need to defend yourself.
6. They randomly throw positive reinforcement into the mix to confuse you.
While normally this person is tearing you down, occasionally they will throw a compliment in to make you reconsider things. This is something they do to make sure that they are still remaining unexpected. While you may think ‘oh maybe things aren’t so bad’ you couldn’t be more wrong.
7. They make sure you are confused because they want you to be weak.
They want you to be confused because the more confused and weak you are the more power they can and will have over you. While you want them to make you feel more stable they will not.
8. They say one thing and do another.
Their actions never match their words. You need to always look at their actions over their words. What these people say doesn’t mean anything. They are all talk and no action when it comes to fixing problems.
9. They wear you down over time.
They make sure to start off as the perfect partner and slowly ease into being manipulative and controlling. You may not notice when they begin working on gaslighting you but it is happening. Being with a gaslighter is like being in a room full of people and one of them turns the heat up by one degree every 20 minutes or so.
10. They deny things even when you show them proof.
This is how they get you to question your own reality. Once it has gotten to this point if you don’t get out you will be stuck forever. If you know something happened for a fact, don’t accept their denial.
11. They use the things that matter to you against you.
They will attack you when upset. In doing this they will use the most important things in your life as a means of upsetting you. For instance, if you have children, they will say something like ‘you don’t deserve children, they would be better off without you.’ Sadly, things like this happen every single day.
12. They tell obvious lies.
You can see right through their lies and yet you somehow they are able to lie with a straight face. After a while, this will begin to throw you off and you may question yourself more than once. Don’t let them get you.